Sunday, August 3, 2008

Journal notes about being tied up

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Another kind of sychronicity?

Again, I need to rethink my theories about the cause of that inner drive that sometimes makes me feel a need to be tied up. That feeling has been extra strong the last few days.

Earliest theories had to do with socially inhibited sex drive. Last year came a realization that this drive doesn't necessarily have anything to do with sex. Recently I had been drifting back toward updates of the old theory.

Today I was surprised by 4 year old Ian when he brought me a piece of rope, put his hands behind his back and politely asked me to tie his hands. In light of the theories that had been on my mind lately, I was so surprised that I didn't really answer him. He asked me at least three times. Later I found that he asked his dad the same thing last night.

Obviously, Ian's wish to be tied up does not spring from socially imposed restrictions on his sex drive. It pokes a big hole in that line of theories. It leaves me really curious why sometimes, some of us want to be tied up. I will be looking for answers, data, research, and your input.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Ultra narrow focus

This morning I woke up with a message in my head… “It is time that you focus on some teeny narrow topic. The focus will open up new worlds of knowledge. It will show you analogies that will shed light on some of the most important aspects of the universe. DO IT! “

I have often had what I called the lesson of the week or the lesson of the month. It was a topic of fascination and philosophical conversations for a while. After it yielded many fascinating insights into god and the universe, I would be given a new topic.

One silly little physics phenomenon fascinated me for almost 20 years before the time was right to start studying it in great detail. It was Ultra Narrow Bandwidth. By focusing on this impossibly slow and narrow topic, I grew faster than ever before in my life. It resulted in fascinating insights into life, relationships, business and the nature of the universe. (It also earned a decent living for me and hundreds of others.)

There is another topic that has fascinated me for most of my life. I have not told anyone about this fascination until recently because it was not acceptable in the main stream of my culture. A month or two ago, I started realizing that perhaps it ran deeper than only this lifetime. My mind was opened to the vast amounts of psychic energies that could be wrapped up in this silence, this fear about acknowledging a basic and recurring need within me.
Since that time, I have been telling a few trusted people that all my life I have been fascinated by being tied up.
(You can now take one of two stands…
“ Is that all? After such a buildup? Man are you repressed or what?”
or “Ohh, one of those weirdos huh?”)

This is not an unusual fascination. There are many web sites devoted to the topic. What I think is special is a new realization that this is not really about sex. It involves deep energies that may transcend multiple lifetimes and even our contract with god about being in this reality.

These are strange words to come from me. I have always been the rational scientific type. My point of view is widening to include more psychic and spiritual phenomena and how they may relate to the physical life we know.

Anyway, I have been and will be focusing on the feelings and energies associated with being bound. So far it has been yielding some fascinating analogies and insights about the nature of relationships.

Friday, August 19, 2005

It turns out to be a healthy safety valve

Deep inside the mind is a psychological process that has puzzled me for decades. Some sources say that up to 40% of ordinary people are turned on by or have fantasies about being tied up. It doesn't take much time to find out that the internet has thousands of sites that pander to such things. There are also countless manufacturers making hardware to sell for that kind of play.

With most people who actively have such fantasies, it only comes around occasionally when the biorhythms and planets line up just right. The rest of their lives they really have little interest in such things.

Why would someone want to let someone tie them up or tie themselves up?
The answer is emerging... DANGER!

Some people pursue danger. They may drive fast, climb cliffs, take drugs, etc. Experts say that the reason some couples get a thrill from having sex in unusual places is the slight chance of getting caught.

Recent tests have proven that when men are shown pictures of pretty women they are more likely to take risks. (Pictures of plain women have no such effect.)
These things feed my theory…

Built into our genes are forces that convince us to conform and behave for the good of society. At the same time (and for very good evolutionary reasons) we have smaller counter forces that tell us to rebel, beat the odds, try something different. Biorhythms and circumstances sometimes align to make those forces stronger. Like most bio-drives, if they are ignored, they just build up pressure.

Some people end up driving fast cars, where the danger can cause instant carnage and death. Some people chase fast women, where the danger is divorce, disease, etc. For those who play games where they tie themselves up, or let a trusted loved one tie them up, they might get caught, or they have some risk of being controlled by another during their play. The danger is psychologically real but physically inconsequential.

This, if done well, is a healthy and safe way to diffuse our internal biological drives to court danger. Just like swearing, it has to remain illicit in polite society or it serves no function.

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